How to Determine If Your Child is Stressed

Stress is a fact of life. In fact, according to a 2009 survey by the American Psychological Association, a quarter of American adults live with "high levels" of stress. That probably doesn't surprise you--worries about work, finances and children affect most of us on a daily basis. What probably will surprise you, though, is that stress may also affect our children. Learning how to recognize signs of stress in your children and knowing when to seek treatment can go a long way toward keeping them healthy.

Childhood Stress

Parents may not realize it, but kids might worry a lot more than they let on. A lot. The APA's survey revealed that nearly one-third of children are experiencing more stress than they did a year ago. What's more, 14 percent of tweens (ages 8-12) and 28 percent of teens say they worry "a lot" or "a great deal." But only 2-5 percent of parents rate their child's stress as extreme. And, according to this data, children were nearly two times more likely to say that they worried more about their family finances than their parents perceived.

What Do Kids Worry About?

Kids may worry about many things. Poverty and violence can be obvious stressors, but kids may also worry about doing well in school, getting along with siblings, family and friends, family finances, appearance, bullying and managing extracurricular activities like sports.

While sources of stress can vary by age, keep in mind that your child's stress may not always be a bad thing--short term, it may spur him to action and give him the energy and focus he needs to get a job done. When stress becomes extreme or chronic, however, it can be a cause for concern. Over time, it may lead to emotional and physical symptoms, and these can have an adverse impact on your child's health and well-being.

Recognizing Stress

Significant changes in your child's behavior may signal that she is stressed. These can include things like changes in sleeping habits, over- or under-eating, moodiness or behavioral issues. Your child might cry more, start sucking her thumb, rock herself or experience headaches and/or stomachaches. Fingernail biting, hair twirling, aggressive outbursts and bathroom accidents may also be signs of stress but keep in mind that symptoms can vary. "Some children may act out while others may keep to themselves more," says Wendy Rice, Psy.D., a Florida-based licensed psychologist who treats children and young adults. "Increased irritability and even loss of concentration or focus can be signs of stress in an otherwise relatively attentive child." Sometimes thinking about when the changes in the child began will clue parents into possible triggers, Rice says.

Is Professional Help Necessary?

There may be times when your child's stress levels go beyond what you can handle. According to Dr. Rice, parents should consider seeking professional help if they fear that their child is in danger of hurting herself or anyone else, or if the stress seems to interfere with the child's ability to function. "A good rule of thumb is that if problematic feelings or behavior lasts longer than two weeks, professional help may be warranted," she says.

You May Be Able to Help

Talking to your child might help reduce his amount of stress. Children may appreciate related stories about how you handled stressful situations, so consider sharing your thoughts. But, at the same time, try to give him your full attention and allow him to finish his points before you jump in. Adequate sleep, proper nutrition and simple breathing techniques may also help alleviate anxiety. If possible, try to keep stressful adult situations--like finances or marital problems--to yourself. Remember, too, that a constant reminder of love, trust and encouragement may be all that your child needs to ease his worried mind.